I'm Making It Day by Day!

The Topanga Gallery 2012 Juried Open

2012-01-15T13:35:00.000-08:00

Dear Friends,

Some of you I see often; others are always on my mind even as we are not currently in communication. I wanted to share fantastic news with all of you and extend an invitation.

I submitted a piece of my work to the Topanga Gallery in Topanga Canyon for their Juried Open 2012 competition and was selected as one of 51 artists who's work is on display. There is going to be a reception there on Sunday, January 22 from 2pm to 5pm; I would love to see any or all of you if you are not involved in anything else that day and could see your way clear to join me. There will be refreshments served and if I am very lucky, maybe my piece will be sold and you won't have a chance to see it - lol!

If you live in the Los Angeles area and would like to come, here is a link for more information: http://www.topangacanyongallery.com/index.html

http://www.topangacanyongallery.com/index.html

I surely hope to see you there!

Laura

Fight or Flight

2011-12-17T08:14:00.000-08:00

The best and the worst thing about the internet is that once you put something out there, it's there forever. You can delete it, but in fact it's still there as back-up on the server level, and also often there are other trails that are easy to follow if anyone is actually interested. That's why it's standard advice these days that kids be made very aware of what they are posting so that later, when they try to get jobs, what they are saying now is not held against them.

In addition, if you are using the internet, you can and will be found if somebody wants to know what you are saying and where. It's not hard, and no blocks or filters can keep anyone out who is determined to peek into your life. That's a fact, and you don't know who's looking, or for how long until they choose to expose themselves.

I have learned just how powerful and dangerous this tool called the world wide web can be. Things written in innocence can be misconstrued and opinions can be formed about who someone is when you, in truth, really have no idea. You only see what they write, and most people take on a persona of one sort or another when they are in a blog, on Facebook, or wherever. You can't really know what the person is really all about until you get to know them in person, and sadly - for today's generation, most of their social interactions are over the computer and they really don't know who they are playing with!

There's another aspect, though, too. As I mentioned above, the internet is forever. The internet is accessible. You cannot hide on the internet no matter what you might think. If you don't want your friends - or enemies - to find you, you shouldn't be putting it out there in the first place. But it's also a sad statement about somebody's personality that they feel that they need to even hide what they are doing! What's so terrible that they can't stand up and let the world see? Are they criminals? Are they doing something outside of the social moray? Are they just cowards?

I, for one, don't hide. I don't block people from my accounts, I don't run and hide. I am not an ostrich hiding my head in the sand. I've learned some hard lessons from the internet, but I've faced them and stood up to them. I continue to do so, and to take responsibility for my words and actions. I don't always like what I've learned - about myself or others - but I know that to be sneaky and serrupticious is the hallmark of those who are not self confident; are not really interested in growing.... learning... changing, and I always want to do all of those things!

I pity those who can't come to terms with who they really are and feel the need to hide rather than stand up and be seen with pride.

A Picture's Worth 1000 Words!

2011-12-11T15:01:00.000-08:00

Right from the start, I struggled with taking pictures of my jewelry. Step by step, I went through levels of discovery and started to put out pretty decent pictures. But all of that changed about a week ago when I finally figured WHAT the different settings on my camera meant and how to use them effectively. I'd keep writing but instead, I'm just going to share some older pictures (like a month ago) vs some I took today. Amazing, the difference!!!!!

I was so pleased with these pictures when I took them. But look what I achieved today!

Colors brighter; image sharper without any digital intervention at all!

Then:

Today:

Colors sharp, and you can see the depth of the focal bead!

Then:

Today:

You get a feel for the variegated colors within the focal heart, and also of the thickness/substance of this focal bead. Also, this picture shows off the beautiful filigree bail effectively.

This quantum leap did not happen on it's own. I am a huge believer in continuing education; not necessarily formal but steady and from a variety of sources. I take classes, I get together with friends and compare notes, I look at You-Tube and other "how to" sites, and I subscribe to magazines. The magazine that helped me the most with my photography was "The Crafts Report" which bills itself as "The Business Resource of Artists and Retailers." It's a small magazine with a minimum of advertising and articles that seemed too simplistic as I first received this publication, but over time have come to appreciate the straight-forward information on a variety of subjects within the artist's world including how to set up displays at shows, pricing, success stories, and a number of other "departments" including my personal favorite of the moment, CRAFT Photography by Steve Meltzer. The information is so easy to follow, the tips so simple and yet so profound, and the accessories he suggests to improve pictures are all so do-able that it was only a matter of time after I understood he was there that my pictures moved forward.

The only issue with this entire learning curve is now I am dissatisfied with many of my old pictures and hate to take the time to re-shoot jewelry. On the other hand, the pictures I take will be of items not moved, and who knows if it was just because the colors were not good or they weren't sharp enough that they did not sell.

Oh, but to have 48 hours in every day!

Happy Thanksgiving!

2011-11-24T13:45:00.000-08:00

Our turkey's in the oven, most of the side dishes made. Now I'm starting to prepare the vegetables for my prize-winning "Chicken Pot Pie Soup" and will make it using the leftover turkey instead of chicken, as soon as the table is cleared. It will make a wonderful meal tomorrow!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!!!

And the Winning Bunny Cage Is....

2011-11-23T10:32:00.000-08:00

Trixie Natura 3 Story Rabbit Hutch

Item#: TXE013

Ordered today; it's scheduled to deliver on December 5, FREE SHIPPING!

Since Gigi lives indoors, we've already decided that the best way to handle the open bottom is to get some floor tiling; enough to set the cage on top, and then cover it with a rug of some sort. Since Gigi has proven herself to be fully housebroken, we don't anticipate any issues if she decides to use the bottom as her bathroom.

We're very excited to see how she likes her new home, and if the ramps don't prove to be too steep for them to climb, we will consider another of the same for the Guinea Pigs! I would love to see side-by-side town homes - lol!

Thank Heavens For Little Girls!

2011-11-22T17:50:00.000-08:00

After Janet passed away, since she had lived such a short mousey life, I decided to take our Vet's advice and bring Miles Robo Hamsters home as his new pets. They are very tiny, weighing in at only 2/3 Janet The Mouse's highest weight of 36 grams. They are fast, cute, and very funny. But they are not holding types of hamsters. They're more of a view and be amazed kind of pet.

It's amazing that I even got this one clear picture. I must have taken over 100 of them... all grey blurs. That is, when the hamsters were in the lens at all by the time the mechanics of the machine worked and the aperture opened up. Yes, they really are that fast!

They didn't work out so well for Miles. First, after the initial excitement wore off, he was sad that he didn't have pets that were slow enough to hold. Additionally, Ralph-The-Cat was able to get hold of one that escaped it's cage (that's a story... the cage was locked up tight and there was no place for that hamster to escape, but I have my theory as to how it got out which will remain internalized until such time as I have some proof) and we were down to two.

Miles wanted a different kind of hamster... one that was slow enough to hold, and after we finished the Pizza Party for his Little League Football Championship Game, we went next door to Kahoots to look at the animals. We looked at lizards and snakes, mice and rats, and finally the hamsters. Even the birds. But Miles was drawn to the pen that held the bunnies and Guinea Pigs. He was particularly transfixed by a very sweet Lop Ear Rabbit, and that's when he announced that he would rather have a bunny than a hamster.

I thought that was actually a good idea, and told Eric so! Bunnies are bigger and tougher than small rodents, and if you get the right breed, they're friendly, fun, and interesting. They can bond as well as a dog or cat, and again, if you get the right one, they will be housebroken and use a litter pan in their cage for their business. So Miles was estatic as we agreed that he would have a rabbit as his next pet, although a little disappointed that we would not buy him the lop. But as we saw it, there was no reason that we could not go to the animal shelter and get a rescue as soon as we bought it a house. We decided to look and see what they had at the store... and were astounded by this model:

Available at Kahoots but also on Amazon.com at http://www.amazon.com/Super-Pet-Rabbit-Hutch-2-Story/dp/B004E8MEDK/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1322009014&sr=8-1

Thank goodness for our I-phones, though! We were quickly able to see that they charged too much for this particular model, as much as we were taken by it, and decided to pass at that moment. Miles, devastated, kept a stiff upper lip, but was shocked when I said that there was really no reason that we couldn't go to the pound and rescue one right away anyway. And even Eric was surprised at the solution.

We had found a wire dog crate at the side of the road in our neighborhood quite some time ago, and had never even finished cleaning it. It has been laungishing at the front of our property, and every time I saw it, I had a pange of regret and guilt because it was a wonderful cage that just needed a little TLC, and also it made the front yard look messy. I suggested we could quickly clean it up and it would make a fantastic temporary house for a bunny until we could settle on a final choice, and with that, Eric took Gabby home while Miles & I headed directly for the West Valley Animal Shelter.

They had about 20 rabbits there, and Miles was mortified. After all, he is very sensitive and was quite aware - without prompting - that to take one of them was to risk the rest of their lives. He had a very hard time choosing one out, but finally made a 1st and 2nd choice. As soon as we learned that choice #2 had already been spay and could come home the same day, he changed his mind, and that's how Gigi came to live with us!

She is an English Angora bunny, which means that when her hair grows long, she will make a great fiber source for the spinning that I thought I had given up. In addition, they are very quiet and friendly bunnies, bred to be handled for their wool, and large enough to have a fighting chance against Ralph, who has become quite the hunter since his initial success.

We are being very careful with Gigi, but we let her outside of her cage to play a couple of times a day when the dogs are outside and the cat is locked up.

The funniest thing is that she is quite curious about her neighbors, the Guinea Pigs "Charlie (Manson)" and "Jeffrey (Dahmer)" - because anything that cute and sweet and harmless needed to be named after mass murderers, and the Pigges are curious about her too.

Miles is delighted by a pet that can play on it's on as well as be held and cuddled.

...and for the cage issue? We've found that the crate is working wonderfully as a temporary house while we consider our options. Gigi turns out to be fully housebroken and hasn't had an accident since we installed a littler tray in her house.

And we're puzzling over which house to buy her. We did some exploration on the internet after we came home, and knowing that she is just fine where she is at for a while, we're taking our time in making a choice for her permanent abode. Some of the homes which we are considering are:

http://www.amazon.com/Ware-01517-Premium-Penthouse/dp/B001AT9P2Y/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1322009014&sr=8-4

http://www.amazon.com/Trixie-62321-Natura-2-Story-Rabbit/dp/B000WFFZCG/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1322009014&sr=8-7

Advantek High Rise Rabbit Hutch

http://www.amazon.com/Advantek-High-Rise-Rabbit-Hutch/dp/B004FN4AFO/ref=sr_1_21?ie=UTF8&qid=1322010488&sr=8-21

Ware Premium + Bunny Cottage


http://www.amazon.com/Ware-01535-Premium-Bunny-Cottage/dp/B002QT8I5W/ref=sr_1_55?ie=UTF8&qid=1322010727&sr=8-55

Expandable Hoppity Habitat Rabbit Cage


http://www.amazon.com/Expandable-Hoppity-Habitat-Rabbit-Cage/dp/B002J697IE/ref=sr_1_1?s=pet-supplies&ie=UTF8&qid=1322011099&sr=1-1 and yes, if we go this route, we'll get at least two to connect together and maybe three.

There were even more cages of interest, but they were just too big because we also need to re-house the Guinea Pigs and we have limited floor space available to all these animals. But who knew that there were so many options?

If anyone has any opinions of these different houses or better yet, has used one or another, we'd love to hear from you about it. And, of course, we always love hearing from you anyway!

But for now, Gigi already thinks she has hit it big, but doesn't have a clue what is in her future. :D

Thanksgiving Shopping 2011, Round 1

2011-11-20T23:37:00.000-08:00

It was a dark and stormy day.


View from Eric's car of the Farmer's Market.

Not a joke. It was pouring rain this morning, and instead of getting up early to go to the Farmer's Market - the first time in a long time - to buy our vegetables for Thanksgiving, we slept in. At 9:00, I finally got up, and Eric followed me at 9:30. We puttered around a bit, getting dressed, then Eric asked me the question on both of our minds. "Do you think anyone will be at the Farmer's Market today with all this rain?"

I answered with more assurance than I felt. Maybe I was a bit delusional. "Sure they'll be there, even with the rain. Do you think they're going to miss the last weekend day of selling before Thanksgiving? No way!"

Well, like I said in my last post, sometimes being delusional is a good thing, for when we got in the car and drove there, stopping only at the ATM for cash money, pretty-much all the vendors were there with their wares set up. Gorgeous vegetables... equally as gorgeous fruits! Breads and pastries and sauces and Hummus. The crowd's spirits were dampened, but our regular vendor's attitudes were that of fortitude, and we bought more than we should have because it's Thanksgiving and they're vegetables, and we appreciated these fine folks being out there in the rain despite the obvious reasons not to be.

A couple of my favorite vendors:

There are many MANY more booths that I frequent every single time I'm out too, although most of them don't have big, pretty banners like these.

Look at the colors of the market today. Unbelievable!

All of this makes me very glad that I live in Southern California, even on days like this:

But although today's weather did not dampen our Holiday Spirit one bit, we do have some dark clouds ahead, in the name of a Costco run, and also, the turkey we are currently defrosting was in Eric's freezer for three whole years! There is no expiration date on the bird, but we have no idea whether it will prove to be good or not when the time comes to prepare it for the feast.

Before Costco, though, we have to go to a regular supermarket, and also Whole Foods. Food for thought, food for intuition and blogging, and food for an army. Thank goodness we live in a state of plenty, where the children have the option of turning their noses up at vegetables and we don't have to eat the turkey if it's anything less than perfection. Our family has a lot to be thankful for.

Spinning Navajo Style!

2011-11-19T22:14:00.000-08:00

At WeFF, the plan was only to buy things pertinent to my business. A button to be used as a pendant in a necklae here.

A couple of books.

A skein of silk Ribbon "yarn" to be used in a different style of necklace.

I didn't plan to buy anything related to spinning at all. After all, at the moment, it isn't for me. But I passed a booth by Rancho Borrego Negro, a beautiful booth that had the most wonderful Navajo Spindles ever, and I was mesmerized. Navajo spinning is different than than other forms. The spindle is very large, and I mean VERY large, and I had heard that all you could make was chunky yarn on it. That is, until Eric took that Navajo Weaving class last April and I learned from the sisters - and saw them demonstrate - that you could make yarn at any WPI, and in fact, most of the yarn that they put out was drop dead gorgeous and fit for sweaters, not just for their very beautiful rugs. I asked them to send me a spindle (which I would pay for, of course); they promised they would but they never did... They are world famous for their work and I suppose they just got caught up in other things and forgot.

Well I forgot too. That is, until I saw those amazing spindles at WeFF in the Rancho Borrego Negro booth.. They were made of exotic woods, and when I played with them, they were balanced beautifully. I did not try to actually spin on them as I was not there to buy spinning equipment, but I was drawn back to them over and over again!


Kathy and, I think, her husband in their 2010 Weff Booth

And then I found that special spindle. The one with a little extra weight... the one who's balance is so perfect that one turn will keep it spinning for a very long time... the one made of an exotic African Wood. And I lusted after it and walked away and back and away again. Bought the button that I pictured above, And lamented internally about that spindle.

"This is ridiculous!" I thought to myself. "You're just succumbing to your old habit of buying hand spindles. You have tons of different spindles at home and never use them. You don't need this spindle!" And yet it called my name.

And wouldn't you know it. The one that I loved the most was also the most expensive one on display, albeit only $10 more than it's siblings. Eric must have seen the dilema in my eyes. Also, since he is weaving Navajo Style, it would be fun for him if I spun him the yarn using a Navajo Spindle. But mostly, I think that he just felt my pain and decided to be an Enabler. "Buy it!" he said. As I resisted, he insisted. "Buy it! You want it! There's no reason you can't have it." And in the end, I did.

Navajo Spindle and basket of Romney in the foreground; Sophie in the background.

Kathy suggested that I e-mail her and ask for links to YouTube to teach me how to spin Navajo style. I laughed, saying that I had spun for many years and although this spindle looks a little different, I'm sure I would pick it up quickly. Then Kathy and her husband both laughed and told me to e-mail them. I have not, yet, to date, done it.

I did, however, look at one You Tube video on the subject all on my own, and I figured that I could do this, so as I always do, I just charged ahead and started to spin. Guess What? It wasn't as easy as it looks!

First, the video I saw suggested not using a leader line to spin with. I listened to them, and just put gobs and gobs of roving on the spindle instead. This method actually worked, but I'm sure I'm missing something because it took way longer than it did in the video. Then for the spinning proper.

Yes, some of the roving is peach. I experimented with a new dye on a small portion of the roving. Is it Navajo Colored? Not really, except that it was spun on a Navajo Spindle and I guess that makes it a Navajo color, whether traditional or not.

Navajo spinning really IS quite different than spinning with a drop spindle. First, you don't have the weight and gravity working in your favor, the spindle freefalling so that you can use both hands to attenuate the fiber. Instead, you are rolling your spindle along your thigh with one hand (for me, my left) while working with the fiber with your right. I.e., the long draw is essential.

I have not done long draw spinning in many years, so it wasn't so easy to just pick up. Especially when my feet wanted to paddle but the spindle demanded that I roll it down my thigh. Spinning was like chewing gum and skipping and doing a hand-clap dance all at the same time!


The basket was purchased in 2003 at the New York Sheep and Wool Festival and I can't tell you who made it. I wish I could. I'd like to buy more of her baskets myself if only I knew who she was.

Then, of course, I did the dumb thing and used garbage roving to start off with. I knew better, but I did it anyway. Everyone knows that when you are teaching a new student to spin, start them off with the most wonderful prepared fiber you can find so that all they need to concentrate on is the actual method of spinning rather than fighting the fiber too. But Noooooooo, I had to use up the junk roving because I didn't want to throw it away and I knew that as my first practice skein,; it wouldn't matter how bad the yarn turned out. But I couldn't get it to spin right and eventually gave up and went with the Romney Roving, beautiful looking stuff that Mom pushed on me a couple of years ago.

Things went better then. At least until my single started breaking regularly and I discovered that the roving that looked so very fine actually had a lot of second cuts in it! You couldn't tell from the prepared fiber itself, but work with it and it's immediately apparent. On a regular wheel when I have both hands available, I would just pick those cuts out and continue on without hesitating, but it's not so easy when you're doing the long draw and are also focusing on spinning the spindle.

I removed a whole section of roving from my basket, and at that point, things started going better again. And I discovered a number of things.

You can spin almost as fast on a Navajo Spindle as you can on a wheel! That was an amazing discovery and very illuminating, as now I know why the Navajo still use their spindles when making their rugs. I didn't understand it before buying this spindle. Drop spindles are inherently very slow. This is not a drop spindle, and WOW! is all I have to say.

You can spin thick or thin on a Navajo Spindle, just as on a wheel. I have a feeling that with practice, I will also be able to control my singles just as well as on the wheel when doing the long draw, and be able to make designer yarns at will and with intention.

A Navajo Spindle will hold just as much single ply yarn as a moderate sized spool on a wheel, and maybe even more! The first is absolutely evident, and the second, based on how the tool works, is implied.

I have a feeling that when I go to ply, it's going to be more difficult than on a wheel because I will be forced to roll the spindle in the opposite direction on my thigh. I will post a report when I get that far. For now, I am still working on my first ball of single.

Finally, I think it may be a good idea not to be so brave and e-mail Kathy to get those YouTube links after all. While I have the basics down on my own, spinning - on a spindle or on a wheel - is all about the fine tuning, and I've got a long way to go to be attuned to my new toy.

But was I wrong to go off on my own before reviewing the video that they suggested? Some people might say I was delusional for giving it a try by myself, but I've been called that before, even very recently, and things still worked out well for me. They usually do. One person's delusion is another's dream that will develop into greatness!

For me, there is never a penalty for taking a bold stand and taking chances. If I make a mistake, it's an opportunity for learning. If I do it right the first time, then it's just plain sweet! Either road is just fine in the end. In this case, my experience was somewhere in the middle... I learned a lot and I learned that I have a lot to learn. But as my old friend Nancy G- used to say, "No Guts, No Glory." I'm glad that I'm brave enough to not stick my head in the sand, not hide from the world, and be willing to take chances. For in those chances is the opportunity to do something new and great, and the road always makes one hell of a good story.

PS - Delusion or a good idea? Watch this video and let me know what you think. Bottom line, though, is this spindle works and she's right. When she's done spinning, she can cook with it too!

Arte De Mexico

2011-11-18T22:34:00.000-08:00

I first learned of - and visited - Arte De Mexico some 20 years ago. I was amazed at this home decor location, a favorite of home decorators and designers from around the world, and quickly brought my parents back to see it. As a threesome, we frequented it often, and Dad occasionally made small purchases. His home was already museum quality, and there wasn't room for much more in the way of art, furniture, or other objects, but he was so mesmarized by this place that he couldn't stay away. Neither could I.

I never dreamed that I would someday own some of their amazing work. But the dream that never came has happened. Eric & I have finally bought new bedroom furniture, and from Arte International (the new name for Arte De Mexico as they bring things in from all over the world now, not just Mexico)... my old haunting grounds.

We've spent a good number of hours in the past week, going up and down their aisles and seeing everything they have to offer. The inventory itself has changed, but not the style or the high standards. I love this place so much that I have to share it with you. Enjoy the pictorial tour! (My apology for the sideways pictures... something is going wrong with the interface between my computer and blogspot again, but I knew you wouldn't want to miss anything, so please bear with it.)

I'll share more pictures with you later.

And as for our bedroom furniture? That's another post for another day, for some of it was in stock at the store, some of it is coming from the east coast, and the bed itself? Well, we bought a transom window which is going to be built into a custom bed for us, unlike anything we've ever even conceived of let alone seen!

We'll be back soon!

A Haiku

2011-11-13T07:12:00.000-08:00

Romantic last night
Making love by fire place
Sophie chews my shoe

WeFF and Camelot and then Today

2011-11-10T00:59:00.000-08:00

Every year on the first Sunday in November, the Southern California Handweavers hold their annual Fiber Festival at the Torrance Cultural Arts Center. This year was no exception.

Eric, Gabby, and Miles accompanied me in the late morning, and shortly after noon, we arrived.

As soon as I walked through those doors, I was accosted. One friend after the next stopped me, seemingly as thrilled to see me as I was them. I was ever so excited that Dave is moving only about a mile from where I live. I was extraordinarily happy to run into other great friends like Garen and Nancy, Shari, Ann, Helene, and so many others that I am going to stop naming them here as if I try to name them all, I'll forget somebody and that person will be hurt. But I love you all.

It was difficult to get any shopping done for everywhere I turned, I was engaged in another conversation. Eric even commented that he thought that I knew and was friends with every single person in the whole event; vendors and shoppers alike. And that was almost true. There were a couple of new vendors that I haven't had time to make friends with yet.

Then today, I took Gabby up to her horseback riding lesson for the first time in probably a couple of months. Issues of health have made the drive impossible, but other issues of timing made it impossible for her to go unless I bucked up and drove. And I was greeted there like a long-lost friend; a returning hero.

After all, I do know horses, even if it's been decades since I rode myself, and I am of like mind with the people in charge. I was so happy to see them and they were happy to see me too.

Finally, today, I had lunch with a long-lost friend who wasn't able to make it to our wedding reception, but she came armed with a beautiful wedding gift as well as a patient attitude as I spent some of our precious time together dealing with a crises that Miles was having at school. We picked up right where we left off despite the intervening weeks and months and over a year. That's a real friend for you.

When things seem bleak and I'm all alone, I just have to look back at this post and then remember this week. There are a lot of people who have got my back. Wonderful people. Lovely people. People with their heads on straight. They are patient as I work through the issues we have as a family, and love me all the more for seeing me succeed at a very hard transition. I thank you one-and-all for your steadfastness, and I look forward to having you over and entertaining you very soon.

xoxoxoxo

Family Matters: 10/ 14/2011, A Parade of Doggie Halloween Costumes

2011-10-17T08:47:00.000-07:00

It's October and with children, matters of Halloween have come up. What to wear as costumes is of prime importance to Miles, and Gabby, although she feigned indifference over the past couple of days, was originally excited at the concept of being a Peacock (perfect for her because she's so beautiful and no, I have not informed her the female peacocks are reserved and brown and it's their male counterparts that display the beautiful tail feathers), and now thinks that she will wear her riding clothes out for trick-or-treat. Although I loved the peacock idea, it could turn into something quite expensive and the riding idea not only will be something that we won't see coming and going, but she already has everything she needs on hand. Her prime directive there is to gather enough candy (aka inventory) to make a fortune on selling at school (the movement to remove candy and other sweet treats from the campus was stupid as the kids just bring it in and sell it anyway, taking profits out of Los Angeles Unified's pocket), so the less money spent on a costume, the better.

For Miles, all he wanted to be was a character out of Halo. Now he knows that Halo is not a game that I will allow back in this house again, but I agreed that if he wanted to be a character, I could live with it. Unfortunately, the only thing he has found in that area so far runs well into the $150 range and there's no way we're spending that much money on it, so I'm not sure what he has in mind.

We take the kids to an Ultimate Trick-Or-Treat zone in Calabasas, a very rich community just outside of Los Angeles, and we go to the "poor" zone where the houses only cost slightly over a million each, and they're long and narrow and set very close together. The candy they give out in that neighborhood reflects the generalized wealth of that area and because so many people visit them, a large number of the residents put on terrific displays and many even have shows!

Our own neighborhood, because the houses are large, set far apart, set far back on the properties, and most of which have fenced permiters, gets no trick-or-treat traffic at all, so that frees both Eric & I up to go with the kids. We enjoy that activity an awful lot.

Many people take their dogs out in that neighborhood when they take the kids, dogs in costume too. Last year we took Lucy, wearing her bunch-of-grapes costume. Sunny was just too old to participate in such a vigorous activity although he enjoyed wearing his costume during our wedding reception. I actually think he probably enjoyed having the entire house to himself while we were gone. I can't say that for sure, but Sunny was exceptionally intelligent and I know how I feel during those precious moments that I'm here alone. Free to do whatever I want... to be productive or to take a nap without interruption. But back onto topic.

This year we have Lucy and Sophie. Both dogs love to go places, Sophie is certainly young enough (and interested enough) to participate, and while we have the grape costumes on hand again, truth be told, my original idea for our wedding reception was for the dogs to wear skeleton costumes. Sadly, only one showed up, and that was not only too late for the reception, but for halloween as well. I was going to return it, but never got around to it. In the end, that was terrific because we didn't want to repeat costumes this year (first because it would be boring but mostly because Lucy cannot resist attacking Sophie's grapes - lol!) and the skeleton fits Sophie perfectly! Sophie is not the least bit disturbed by wearing clothing, so we now have to decide whether to get a matching skeleton for Lucy or something else. I'll take pictures of the dogs in their costumes on Halloween and share them for you, but for now, let's just say that a black dog wearing a black outfit with a glow-in-the-dark dog skeleton imprinted on it is a very effective look!

Anyway, we started looking at pictures on the internet, trying to figure out what to do for Lucy, and were very happily surprised at the options that presented themselves!

Although this Dogzilla is in Extra Small, I have a feeling that if we looked around, we'd find one big enough for Lucy and gawd only knows that the theme would be appropriate for her personality!

Cave Dog!

Shark Eating the Dog!

Here's the Skeleton we already have. It looks much better on our dogs.

Hmmmm... This is also a costume based in black and certainly the Bee would be appropriately humiliating for Lucy, not that she'd notice.

Could we get this Elephant on Lucy before she tore the trunk off in play?

There's no way! Lucy would rip the skirt of this Witches costume to shreds as soon as she took the hat off and played with it to death!

While this Devil costume is very tempting, do we really want to encourage Lucy?

Tinkerbell. Hmmm.... tempting!

A Pirate. Another very tempting choice!

The costumes above are all available on Amazon.com. But of course, I didn't want to completely ignore Etsy, my favorite hand-crafted buying forum. So here's a few of my favorites available there:

A Doggie Hula Costume! I really like it.But it's only displayed on a stuffed dog. How would a real dog feel about it?

There's little question how this dog feels about this monster hat. Now that's the Halloween Spirit! But I don't think that Lucy could be taken down so easily.

Bat Dog!!!!!!

I can't believe I ate the whole thing1 I feel like such a Cow!

Maggie Simpson, anyone?

Carmen Miranda! Now this is tempting - lol!

Now if you're serious about dressing your dog up, there are many places to go to buy them. This is but a small selection that I found on line, and you can find them in many brick-and-mortar stores too. Please enjoy the holiday and be safe, and if you can enjoy committing your canine to participating too, then happy shopping!

You Can't Go Home Again

2011-10-12T20:50:00.000-07:00

It's been such a long time since I've posted here, and even longer since I posted regularly. Amazing, since at one point in the not-that-distant past, I wrote very regularly about anything and everything, almost every day. What a change my life has brought me over the last year!

One year ago yesterday, I married the love of my life, Eric.

It has not been a smooth transition at all. The wedding itself was difficult - a portend into the future perhaps? - and the reception? Ah, the reception.

Where my some of my "best friends" conspired to betray me, leaving me officially a couple of months later. In the 60 days between the initial unfriending and the final once-and-for-all parting, I grew intensely weary of their rabid backstabbing, their emotional issues, their refusal to face reality... that I was not and never was the person that Richard Simmons pretended that I was and certainly was not during the wedding or afterward. When pushed to undue lengths, guess what? I can get emotional and break down too! By the time they left me for good, I was glad to see them go and even celebrated with an Animoto Video in honor of all unfriending:

That video, inspired by an idea from Eric, gave me the ability to laugh at the situation that I should have seen was inevitable for months and maybe a full year before our marriage. We were parting ways anyway as they were spiraling out of control without a parachute to soften their landing. As my own life also spiraled and I needed to focus all my attention on myself to regroup, they could no longer rely on me to be there to listen to and support them. Indeed, talking to them was wearying as we were no longer in the same place, so in the end, the end was no loss. And, in fact, I still laugh at the "Unfriended" video which is a good thing. As my life continues to change and I lose more and more of my old friends, it reminds me of something that I posted on Facebook at some point in the past year (paraphrased):

"Some friends are forever. Others come into our lives for a period of time, but will not always be there. I love and appreciate both, as they have all helped me grow and develop as a person. Those who are still with me are truly golden. But even of those who I have lost, I think fondly of them, miss them, and wish them the best."

The truth is, though, that most of the people at the Wedding Reception truly did wish me well. I hold on to that, even as I still wince at the betrayal. At least half of my friends there, even as I have not seen them regularly as my life has changed, remain true and steadfast, and when I finally get settled, I know that they will be there to welcome me back.

But then there are the others. The others who, after they crippled me and badmouthed me, banished me from their world. Again, a very abrupt change in lifestyle. The truth is that the moment Sh- stomped on my foot, I knew that I was done, that the injury was serious and devastating, even as I pretended to myself - confirmed by well meaning but unaware physicians in the ER at Cedars - that it was no big deal. I remember even exclaiming, as I was helped to the dressing room, "I hate this place!" And I meant it. I had had my family and especially my children ripped to shreds by "our mighty leader" only the weekend before in a class where mostly people I don't know attended. His exact words: I hate that you got married. I hate even more that you have children. And why? Because I had gained some weight and he could not use me publicly anymore.

Guess what? I had tried to tell him before that weekend, only to be blasted and later have him characterize that interchange as "a joke" that my health was worsening, that lack of exercise and the drugs I was being fed had more to do with the gain - of substance but not that critical in the overall scheme of things - than the marriage. But he was angry, he's on some kind of spirling-out-of-contol downward path himself (only look at him and how he presents himself in the past 9 months and you know in an instant that this is true), and human. My situation was stressing him out, even before the accident. And after the accident? He didn't want to deal with it or he couldn't deal with it. I don't know which it was, but I tried - stupidly - to try to get him to correct a situation that he did not want to see in order to keep others from getting hurt. I do not regret for one moment, even up to this day, that I tried to get him to see. I am at peace with myself for my words and actions. But that does not change what happened.

He took my words and led a "We Hate Laura" campaign within his world, pretty-much ensuring that the main players ( a few exceptions and you don't know how much I love you for seeing the truth and maintaining some contact even as your own reputations in that world would be threatened by communication with me) also exorcised me, without even knowing the entire truth. That I wanted nothing more than to have peace and all I wanted was for the right thing to be done. At that time, I had no idea that accidents such as mine had already occurred in that same location; that people had been paid off to keep quiet about them. At this time, I still don't have all the details although that is likely to come out still, but there is no question in my mind that I am probably more seriously physically hurt in that environment than anyone in the history of the establishment. Emotionally, though, not so much.

Yes, it hurts. I cry all the time when I realize how alone I am and how I've been cut out of a very special relationship without a second's thought. But then again, I always knew that I was different than the pack. I did not and never did subscribe to the cult mentality. And so I remember that I really meant it when I exclaimed to myself in that moment of shock and pain that "I hate this place!" and also, I did my best. The last communication sent off, just before the "Staff Meeting" where it was agreed that I was now an enemy of the state, said:

Dear R-,

I am praying this afternoon. I am praying that tonight's staff meeting is productive, harmonious, and has a good outcome. I am praying that you are protected from those things I fear for you the most, and that the group comes up with good and actionable ideas that can be implemented either now or over time.

I pray that everyone comes out of it feeling positive about themselves and S-, and that feelings are not bruised too much. I pray that my letter is understood in full context and that nobody feels that it is anything other than a vehicle asking you-all to take a hard look look at a 'situation' before it turns into something really tragic.

I am still at peace with what I said, even knowing that you will be sharing it with your Staff. My intentions were honorable and good, and it is the truth as I know it. I pray is that my letter creates positive change in which everyone at S-, both Staff and Students, can flourish.

I love S-, I love you, I love your staff. I know what a miracle S- is. I'm praying for you all.

Love,

Laura

I look at that letter from time to time and I know that I did the right thing. And even if the people involved suddenly realized what a grave error they made in their judgement me (unlikely as that world is all about pleasing the demi-god), it would make no difference at all to my status. I am irrevocably damaged by their stupidity and failure to care for those who entrust their bodies - and souls - to them, crippled beyond belief by an accident (yes, the actual event was an accident, but due to what I would consider unforgivable negligence before it) that could have been prevented, and I will never be able to be active in that or any like-it venue again for the rest of my life. And as the world spreads outside of that one classroom and more and more people are getting (and believing ) the company line about what happened, thinking that I am evil, and eschewing of any contact with me, I can live with the results, as hurtful as they are. So be it. The relationship is forevermore dead. Rest in Peace.

And so I moved on. I lost my precious dog Sunny, and as his legacy, adopted Sophie, a delightful girl, emotionally damaged beyond belief from the abuse she suffered before she came into my life as well as her experience in the Lancaster, CA dog pound, a horrific place and a high-kill shelter.

I also lost an adversary by the name of Garrett who lived in our home and was Eric's oldest son, only to have a moment in time last May where the three of us came together as a full and loving unit during a visit by Eric & myself to his school in Utah, and there I gained a step son. Garrett has a long way to go before he is emotionally healed from his issues, but when we sent him off and out of our home - probably forever - with tears standing in our eyes, I had little hope for him. Now I know that while he has his issues, he is not mentally ill. He is not damaged beyond repair. He just has issues, huge issues. He will have to work strenuously on them for many years to come to regain the ground that he lost and continues to lose, but he is showing that he has the capacity for that kind of work in his current location, and is sure to grow and grow up eventually.

I gained a 'daughter', Eric's daughter Gabby who I am so proud to call step-daughter, and helped her find her passion in horseback riding. This is something that she loves, excels in, and because she is determined to maintain this passion while access is tied into her grades in school, she has become an "A" student, and at the same time, is developing the capacity for hard work, compassion, and community service, all under the tutelage of Sandy Springer.

Waiting for Show Results

I am so proud of her. I'm also proud of myself where she is concerned. I have been steadfast that she should have access to horses since Eric & I wed, knowing in my heart as well as my head from my own experiences, that involving her in this activity would be life-changing. I was right.

I continue to advocate for her in this area. Even as we have our differences as most women & teenage girls - especially those who live under the same roof - will have, I delight in her happiness and will do everything that I can to maintain her access to her beloved sport. Assuming that she continues to get the grades. And Gabby, in case you're reading, I know that you will, and over time, getting fantastic grades will no longer have anything to do with horses but will be an end unto themselves. Once you truly taste and understand the fruits of hard work and education, you can never let it go again.

I gained a son in Miles. Eric's youngest, he tears at my heart as he struggles with issues of health, ADD, and emotional despair. He's so much like Eric, Garrett, and even myself as I was growing up. The product of a dysfunctional and hateful situation beyond any kind of belief, he's experienced more pain in his nine short years than most of us will endure over our entire lifetime.   I work hard continuously to help him through his travails, and will continue to advocate for him at any opportunity, and also help him to learn to do the right thing always, even in the face of adversity. He's exceptionally gifted - I'd say brilliant but that's understating his capacity - and we need to find an avenue for him to let it out. I will continue my search until I do.

I gained a husband who, despite our issues as I try to adjust to a very abrupt change in lifestyle and he recovers from what he survived in his former marriage and then as the father of four special needs kids, I love him with all my heart. I will stand by him as he struggles with his own demons, and he is making such amazing progress which is only accelerating in the past couple of months, that I only fear that he will leave me behind and want somebody better when he beads them into submission.

But what of myself? I have devoted all of my time and energy to recovering from the betrayal of friendships, of issues of health, of devastating and crippling accidents, of changing from a single and free woman to somebody who is wholy responsible for the lives of five other people (as well as assorted animals in the dozens). I continue to suffer from horrifying and invasive medical treatments to try and stay the damage from what was done TO me, as well as those longstanding treatments for my various autoimmune issues.

Somewhere in the past year, I've lost myself. I've found myself without friends who I can talk to honestly and candidly as most of them will not understand. I'm walking, yet again, a very unusual life in which few can relate.

I've found myself unable to sustain my creative instinct and business, and barely keep some of my clients happy.

I've found myself without educational outlets, and without the time or energy to pick up new classes.

I've found myself utterly and totally alone and while I have dreams, I cry to Eric on a regular basis " I have nothing left. I've given up everything for this marriage. I have nothing of my own or my identity anymore!"

But I am now formulating a plan to bring those dreams back to life.   There's an old saying: "That which does not kill me only serves to make me stronger." I don't know if I am stronger for what I have experienced or not yet, but I do know that I am not completely dead. And that's why I am posting, at long last, tonight.

I know that I can never go back to the person that I was. I've been changed in ways that you can't recover from, not that I'd want to. Not really. My life now is a culmination of that which I've learned over the past decade. I'm continuing to evolve, but now I want to plan and control it a little bit more. I'm assessing what was best in my former life, and figuring out how to adapt it to my new one.

I think that this blog might be a beginning. I know that I cannot sit down at the computer and type out my heart at a moment's notice anymore. Indeed, it is not a wise thing to do at this juncture, even if I had the time to do so. But at the same time, I miss this form of expression as both a creative outlet, a way to hone my writing skills, a way to communicate with my friends and fans, and a way to release things from my life that are stressful. Also, it's so much fun to share the happy times and bring joy to others, especially those that I've never met.

And so I think that a guarded plan of posting may be a good start.   Maybe three times a week. Developing a new header photo. ?????    And that's where you, my readers - assuming that I have any left - come into the picture.

I would like to know what you'd like to hear about.   I'm thinking that posting on particular subjects on given days may be enough to get me out of my rut. And this is what I am thinking:

Once a week, I will post about my life, my family, my animals, and my health issues. I will talk about what's happening with me, trying hard not to be a downer. I will share funny stories, tell you about people who are inspiring me, and maybe share some of the travails I face as I struggle with issues of family and friends.

Once a week I will post about my journey back to health. About my illnesses and my treatments. About my weight and my struggle to bring it back into line despite challenges of medications designed to put weight on, crippling issues that prevent meaningful exercise, eating "family style" which is not necessarily conducive to being sexy-thin. I will talk about cooking and medications and coping. I will talk about others on occasion who inspire me and/or make me nuts. I may use this blog on this day as a venting board too, as nothing is more frustrating to me than wanting to live a more full and productive life only to have my body betray me.

And Once a week, I will post about my creative side. I will talk about the creative process and what it means to me. I will profile some of my work; how it came to be and what it means to me. I will talk about inspiration vs. creative channeling, how to turn creativity into a small business despite the challenges that I face. I will talk about my successes and also my failures. I will profile other artists I know who are worthy, and maybe some who are not (evil grin). I might talk about the technical side of what I do too. The difference between gold (or silver) plating and fill. How I do what I do. Classes I might like to take or teach. What I have learned. How what I've learned has greater life application.

There can be a lot of crossover between the topics, I'm sure. But these are my proposed general guidelines. And now I would like to know

1. What you think about them.
2. If there are other things you would like to hear about, and if so, will they work under the current topics or should I consider adding one more day into my posting schedule.
3. Is there something that I should stay away from?

One thing that I can assure you, no matter where this blog goes from here forward. I have always written in this forum, first and foremost, for myself. That is not going to change. I've seen friends and "friends" gain popularity in the blog-o-sphere, only to sell out and post what they think their readers want to read, in search of the elusive title of "Super Blogger." I can't go there. My ethics won't allow it; but more important, I'm just not capable of that kind of activity. Yes, my blog might be a tad self-serving. It's been so in the past and so what? Those who write for their readers are self-serving too... they live for one more follower, and another and another... Am I so horrible to write for myself? I think probably not, but if you disagree, I'd like to hear about that too.

But this is the first test. Is anybody still out there? Is anybody reading? Is anybody who IS reading willing to go public and respond? Or am I alone and rebuilding my blog-world as well as my real one? Either way, I will survive and flourish in the end. But it's easier when you are not alone.

I get by with a little help from my friends.   I hope you are out there.

xoxoxoxo

Laura

Doggie Make-Overs! Sophie and Lucy get Bathed and then go out on the Town

2011-07-08T15:53:00.003-07:00

Saving Sophie

2011-07-05T15:01:00.000-07:00

My Next Dog

2011-07-03T14:59:00.000-07:00

Sunny: In Memorium

2011-06-29T16:03:00.000-07:00

To all my friends who were also friends of Sunny,

I'm sad to let you know that Sunny died today at about 2:45pm. He led a very brave fight against both a rare fungus that is difficult-to-impossible to treat and also Melanoma of the Eye. He was very brave, trying to stay with us for as long as he could. He was the very first dog who lived with me for over a decade. Given that I take only rescue dogs and they all, including Sunny, were well past puppy-hood by the time they joined me, this was quite a feat. We're guessing that he was around 13.

Sunny was a very difficult dog when he came to me. He was very frightened, but instead of cowering like every other dog I had ever adopted, he was quite aggressive in his fear, biting me again and again, and also many dogs in his time.   It was far more than once that I was advised that I should put him down immediately, but I refused. I knew that there had to be a good dog inside of him somewhere. I've never met a bad dog. It took years before I became aware that his behavior was not of aggression but of fear. Once I realized it, everything changed between us for the better.

Sunny ended up being a very gentle soul. He helped Ian as an infant and toddler learn to play with and love dogs, gently putting up with his ministrations of love which included fingers in his eyes, ears, and mouth, and also grooming, moaning and yipping in delight. He put up with Cosmos, who was quite difficult to live with if you were trying to compete for love and time, and then recently Lucy, who came to us from the South Central Pound as a puppy and drove him crazy with play. He put up with living in a Condo when, as a large dog, he would have liked nothing better than to have had a large home to live in. Thankfully, we were able to provide that home for him in his last 8 months. He thoroughly enjoyed it.

He was something to be feared in his frightened youth, and thanks to his antics, when my Condominium Complex was over-ridden with Section 8 hoodlums and criminals (after the rebuild from the '94 earthquake, most of the condos were quickly rented out to the city to stem the losses by the owners and they were almost universally occupied by criminals), while I was reviled and threatened by my neighbors because I held a position on the Board of Directors and was tasked to help bring the situation under control, I was never attacked, my home was never broken into, I was always safe because Sunny was at my side.

He was by my side in sickness and in health, at my highest weights, during my weight loss, and during my greatest life transition of all. He was never demanding when I was so sick I was near death myself, instead just laying quietly in the room that I occupied, keeping me company. He walked many miles with me as I started my weight loss journey, and never complained when I became so sick that I could no longer take him out. He put up with me dressing him up for my own and others amusement, most recently appearing at my wedding reception as a bunch of grapes. He loved all of it.

I'm going to miss my boy terribly.   I knew that he was not going to live far into the transition into my new life, but he was something of my old life that was singularly mine, even as he loved Eric and worshiped him long before we were engaged.   I'm sorry that he did not get to live with my family as a young dog. I'm sorry that the children did not get to experience his playfulness and gentle nature.   I'm sorry because I feel like one of the last pieces of me as a single individual has left me.

But Sunny was old. He was suffering. It was time.

Even as I am in a terrible emotional state and I'm not sure how quickly I'm going to be able to act on it, I know that somewhere, there is already another dog who is waiting for us, for a new lease on life. In a week or so, we will start our search, and I'm sure it won't be long before we are able to give somebody a second chance at life. This next dog will be very lucky. It will not be coming into just my home. It will be coming into our home, into a large house with a large yard with two parents and lots of siblings to play with. And Lucy too.   And a cat to torment it. Hopefully, Ralph - the cat - will not be too angry at this new development.

Coming Back to Life

2011-05-29T21:50:00.000-07:00

It's been a painful process, getting married with an instant family, suffering health crisis after health crisis (a couple of outcomes still pending), having a very old and sick dog, and trying to retain my identity. Sadly, some things had to give.

Slimmons... I expect I will never be welcome there again. Long story, don't ask.

Friends: I lost a couple who I thought were "best friends forever" during the marriage process and thereafter, but as I said to my tremendous friend Claudia just last week, in the end they did me a favor. We had gone in separate directions, barely spoke anymore anyway, and as much as the relationships had meant to me, by the time the wedding came around, they were already gone anyway. There was just a pale imitation left and it's a relief not to have to pretend to care anymore. Bottom line... I didn't need the drama.

Jewelry: My crafting and art suffered for the changes, and I did very little to make - let alone promote - my work.

Happily, I've started taking jewelry classes again and have been making new items in profusion. I just listed the first three items in my Etsy Shop:

Make an avatar

I'm happy to say that all these items are listed as part of a fund raising effort for the parenting group BILY (Because I Love You) who is sponsoring a Silent Auction/Poker Tournament on June 12th in Granada Hills along with an inexpensive lunch. If I don't sell one of these necklaces before that date, I will make it available at the Silent Auction to sell for what it will.

I'm proud that the first works I put up in my new equilibrium are for a worthy organization and I am able to contribute and make a difference. I hope that anyone who lives in the area and isn't doing anything that day might come to the event - even if you don't play poker... you don't have to play to come - and see me. I miss my old friends so much.

Of Stepmothers and 9 year old Boys

2011-04-28T08:21:00.000-07:00

As it would happen, yesterday I needed to go onto Miles' school campus playground about an hour after school was let out to talk to the "Coach" about a Pitch, Hit, and Run activity that he was desperately interested in participating in. Miles was unable to get the form to sign up the day before and didn't know how to enter. The front office of the school - typically - didn't know what was happening on their own playground, so it was up to me to chase it down and make his dream of entering come true.. (Miles, extraordinarily intelligent, is smart enough to be acutely aware of his shortcomings, is very shy, and lacks self confidence. Whenever he wants to participate in anything social, I am very, and I mean VERY proud of him, and facilitate it in whatever way I possibly can.)

Anyway, we had a while to wait, and in that time, he and I sat at the lunch tables/benches in the shade and talked about some of the events that had happened at school earlier that day. I really do love that child as I love all of Eric's children. They are so incredibly bright and talented, and yet each flawed in such appealing ways - each distinctly different from each other. No normal human being would be able to resist their charm.

As Miles and I talked, there was a group of boys, clearly Miles' friends and classmates, sitting in a clump together, two rows down and one table to our left. They eyed us with curiosity.

"Is that your Mom?" one of the boys called over to Miles.   Miles thought about it for about 1/2 a second and replied "Yes." I was surprised at being given the honor of being "Mom" and kept quiet.

Then he thought for about 30 seconds and added, "She's my Step Mom."   Of course. That's what I am. No problem.

I started laughing, smiled at them, and said "Of course. I'm his Step Mom. I am evil. Don't I look evil?"

"No!" they all replied in a chorus.

I made a slightly more stern face and said "Do I look evil now?"

"No!" they replied again, laughing like crazy.

I made an angry face and said "How about now? Aren't I evil?"   And Miles called out and said "Be careful dudes, she can get mad."

Our kids think they have seen me mad; and in fact I put on a good act to make an impression on them, but I lost my true sense of inner anger years ago. The only time I get really upset at others now is when I am feeling profoundly ill. What they have actually seen is a very calculated act with the end result of getting what we need out of them .

The boys were not phased, either by my stern look or Miles' warning. They replied in unison "No, you don't look evil!"

And so I stood up, put my most angry face on, put my hands on my hips, and said in a very harsh voice, "Now do I look evil?"

Well, that made an impression. Instead of laughing, the boys just watched me, slightly warily. And one of them piped up, "I'm not afraid of you. I can just run into the 'Men's' room if I have to."

I was laughing hysterically on the inside as I replied "Do you really think a stupid sign that says "Men" could stop me from following in right behind you? And that's when it happened. Miles piped up with his most urgent warning ever.

"Dudes! Don't test her, man! She's seen my Daddy's penis like 90 times!!!!!" (There was a time when I walked in on Miles while he was fully unclothed about 6 months ago, and he was so upset that I had seen his penis that I told him that I had seen his father's penis the night before so he was in good company, and for the next several days, he asked me if I had seen it again and I would jokingly reply 'yes.'   It hasn't come up in many months, but apparently that interlude made a big impression on him.)

There were gasps of horror from every one of the boys. They scattered like bugs in every direction. Despite the new media and the claims of many that kids aren't like they used to be... they know too much and are too sophisticated, I'm here to dispute that claim. Kids are exactly the same as always. The cosmetics of their appearances and lifestyles may be different, but the social norms remain. And 9 year old boys know nothing about the birds and the bees, just as they didn't when I was a child.

I could hardly wait until I was alone with Eric so that I could repeat the story. He and I laughed our asses off when I told it to him. And when I told Adele later that evening, her response was to calculate that Eric & I had been married for 6 months, living together 2 months prior to that, and therefore there had been "x" opportunities to have seen it... and I then reminded her that Eric & I had committed sinful acts even before we moved in together. Yes, I guess it's true. I am evil , at least according to stern religious standards, and I am a Step Mom. And I also think that Miles' estimate was a wee bit low - lol!

Easter, 2011

2011-04-24T21:09:00.000-07:00

A lovely Easter day starting with baskets for the kids (yes, they are 1/2 Christian and we are honoring both sides of their religious heritage), and an Easter Egg hunt.

Later in the day, a trip to Santa Monica Beach including a picnic. Well, sort of. Most picnics are crashed by ants. Ours were crashed by Sea Gulls.

Moving in on our picnic.

Some sea shells Gabby found!

Group hug... me thinks the kids love their Dad!

A song to sing:

A Hike in Chatsworth Park

2011-04-17T09:39:00.000-07:00

Last month, I took Miles for a special "alone" outing to Chatsworth Park. This is a place that I especially enjoyed in my youth, loving to climb up and amongst the rocks to high peaks and then down into valleys not accessible by motorized vehicles. I loved it enough that when my parents stopped taking me there, I would get on my bicycle and ride over 10 miles just to enjoy it.

If the scenes look familiar to those readers of a certain age, they should. This park is located in the Santa Suzanna Pass on the northern tip of both the city of Los Angeles and Los Angeles County. Many Western movies were filmed there, cowboys (and sometimes indians) shooting it out from between the rocky formations.

Miles, Lucy, & I did not ascend to the highest peaks during our outing... Eric texted me on my new I-phone to let us know that he and Gabby were coming to join us and Miles was anxious to go back to the park, proper, to meet them. But we did climb over 2000 feet up the rocks to enjoy views of both the San Fernando Valley and a valley behind us where we could see the still-used railroad tracks of the Pacific Surfliner (Amtrack) as well as the road that real Stage Coaches used into the 1920's and I think beyond.

Once Eric & Gabby arrived, we determined that it was too late for them to enjoy yet another hike. It was about to rain, so we decided on another adventure later into the day. Yes, an urban hike at the Northridge Mall! Gabby did well there, we all had lunch, and oh, what a pleasant family day it was.

Eric & I have committed to provide the kids who are willing to participate - Gabby & Miles mostly - regular family outings where they can see and go to a lot of places they formerly couldn't because as a single father of four, he just didn't have the time. As tough as my own childhood was (oy, don't ask), one of the things I am grateful for is that my parents DID get me around the Los Angeles area and even to other parts of the country. As our children's lives as well as our own become more organized and less chaotic, we are determined to allow our kids (Marsha, if you're reading, I know you're their real mother and I am not and never will try to usurp your role, but I love them too and admire you for bringing such wonderful people into the world. I can't love them as much as you but I do love them and want the best for them as you do) the same opportunities that I remember enjoying.

Ethan's Homework

2011-04-06T23:08:00.000-07:00

Ethan needs help doing his math homework. Anyone want to take a crack at it?

Let us know if you have any problems. Yes, pun intended - lol!

You should all know that Eric will be doing Ethan's homework while he's up in Ojai too. If you make any errors, he will be correcting your work.

Good luck all, and remember, no cheating! You may not discuss these problems with your friends nor may you copy the work of the smart kid sitting at the desk at your left.

Happy April! I'm back with a Contest!!!!!

2011-04-02T08:38:00.000-07:00

Life has kept me busy, but thanks to a certain teenager, a certain dog, and a pizza, I'm baaaaack! If you love Dogs, understand the working of a teenage boy's mind, or enjoy eating Pizza, this survey is for you. Enjoy the show then scroll down for details.

Now here's the deal: Please leave your guess in the comments below or on my
Facebook Page (http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#!/laura.r.silverman) after the same video embedded there, and a pair of my hand-made earrings will be awarded by random number generator to somebody who got the right answer!

The answer isn't as easy or obvious as you might think. The pizza is in easy reach of the dog, the teenager did something not terribly bright (he's very smart... genius level smart, but frequently does stupid things as teenage boys are prone to do), but the dog does not have a normal brain. Eric claims that in it's place there is only a thin plastic soap dish. He says that's not such a terrible thing because then, if Lucy is inclined, she has a place to carry her soap around with her.

On the other hand, look at the look on her face as she stares off in the direction of the pizza, warm and aromatic, and only 10 feet to her right.

But remember, she is not smart. And I'm saying that in a very politically correct manner.

I hope you enjoyed the show and good luck!

This contest is being run because I've just become a proud member of the Etsy Bead Weavers Team. Search " EBW TEAM " on Etsy for more beautiful bead-woven creations or visit our blog for links to all members’ shops: http://etsy-beadweavers.blogspot.com

Struggling

2011-03-02T20:51:00.000-08:00

As the world turns, my issue isn't so great. I have a deadline. It's less than a week away.

I have a set of colors. I though I wasn't going to make the deadline because of a shortage in a particular set of 24 kt gold beads. But my 100 gram refill arrived today, just as I was running out of the old batch.

Instead, I am at risk not only because of my constantly busy schedule, but also because it's hard to match colors at night. Even with an Ott light, what I am seeing visually is not the same as during the day. Forget what the package says. The colors are different.

Now, I started choosing out yet another set of colors for the next part of my super-secret project this afternoon. I'm going to go look at them again, and hope that what I remembered in the light of day translates to the darkest of evenings. I will make up the part again in the new colors, and see what it looks like tomorrow morning.

Fortunately, this particular project is made in pieces which will be linked together. If the next set of two don't work by the light of day either, at least I'll have yet another set of earrings.

Yes, there is always a silver lining. Not that any of the beads I've used thus far are lined in silver...

Last weekend, I was fortunate enough to have my friends over for a Spin-in and Crafting day. The house that I live in with my new family is transitioning from just a house into a home. A place where we can gather in peace and tranquility to pursue our passion in love and support.

T

Living in a Glass House

2011-03-01T21:00:00.000-08:00

I live in a glass house. Every one of us does.

My glass house allows the sunlight and fresh air to come inside. My windows are clean, as is my house, metaphorically speaking as well as for real (at least since we got the housekeepers - lol!). My house allows me to see things as they really are. While there are always issues, my life fundamentally is good and my house is beautiful.

My glass house is blessed with many good friends as well as a loving family, some of whom spent the whole day with me just last Sunday.

Sure, sometimes a stone is thrown at or in my house, and a part of it breaks. Picking up the pieces is a difficult task, and I am often cut by the shards. But the foundation of my house is strong, really strong. I know who I am, and I know where I am going. All things are possible if I work very hard to keep moving towards that which seems impossible. I have learned over the years when to strive for things on my own and when to ask for help. That's how I have come so far as I have, and why I will achieve beyond what anyone ever expected me to be capable of even a couple of years ago.

When stones are cast at my house, it's usually a sign of emotional turmoil, mental anguish on the part of those who cast them. They are living in glass homes too, but can't see or accept reality because their windows are so dirty that they are obstructed beyond usefulness. They don't know what's real versus what's in their own imaginations anymore. They can't see the world outside of themselves.

I'm sorry for them... my heart aches on their behalf. But I will never, and I mean NEVER allow myself to be sucked into anybody's chaos again to the point that I am personally stalled out. Be it family members or friends, I will only journey so far when others are so wrapped up in their own selves and circumstances to such a degree that they prefer having a pity party than cleaning their glass.

I lost a couple of friends in the last two days. I've never been so relieved in my life. I loved them like family and I suppose I always will. But they have dragged me down for months with vicious attacks, disparagement, back stabbing, and then turning around and clawing at me to try and support them. I am finally at a place where I know that I can not and WILL not be all things to all people. I will be more careful in selecting friends in the future, and while I will always be there for everyone who I love and loved, I will not allow that attendance to make me less than what I am or am capable of becoming. Never again.

Friends come and go in one's lives. I've had and lost friends before and I've always survived. I've left friends behind as I've grown and grown up. Friends left me too as they've either grown beyond me and my abilities, or have fallen back into old habits and attitudes. I admire the former, pity the latter.

I will always remember the good times and appreciate all of my relationships, even those that ended on bad terms. I've learned from all my friends and family, and I choose to love them for what they have provided. I also choose, over the long term not to hold onto the hurt once the relationship ends.

And most important of all, no matter what my thoughts and feelings, I will always be open and honest about them. My glass house does not only allow me to see outside, but lets others see inside of me too. Yes, as I've said to the kids in my own home (Garrett) on more than one occasion (Garrett), glass works in both directions.

Like surgery, the anticipation of losing these friendships was worse than the actual event. I've dreaded what happened in the last 24 hours and lived in fear of it for months, but it's finally over and I can move on. I know that every friend that is lost, there is always somebody else to fill the void. Somebody who is in the same emotional and developmental place as me now, who can share experiences and laugh and love and grow right along with me.

Yes, stones were thrown at my glass house, and those who threw the stones damaged it badly. Fortunately, though, the foundation of my house is so strong that nothing can bring it down. I am already rebuilding what was broken, and it will be even more beautiful and substantial than what preceded it.

Photographs "borrowed" mostly from

The Philip Johnson Glass House Blog

A National Trust Historic Site dedicated to the preservation of modern architecture, landscape, and art honoring the legacy of Philip Johnson and David Whitney.

Also borrowed from The Beebonnet Report (thank you Janel for the lovely post about Madrona!)

The Cat vs. The Canary

2011-02-25T08:20:00.000-08:00

Thank you, Elena, for these videos. You made my morning!

Pantone Color Forcasts: Fall, 2011

2011-02-22T23:03:00.000-08:00

And then there's Beading Daily's interpretation of Pantone's Spring 2011 Forecast (for some reason, the link here is not showing on my published blog, but click on the last phrase to see what they had to say) with beads made of different materials suggested to interpret it with. How I love that the entire fashion and wearable art communities are so free with this information so that we can use it - if we choose - to enhance our sales.

We all should know what colors we should preparing our wearable arts and crafts in to maximize sales. Whether we choose to use these colors in our creations or not is a personal choice and more power to each and every one of us for following our heart. But we should have this information available in case we want to take advantage of it.

The best thing about the artistic community is the spirit of sharing. Real artists are not afraid to share their work, their thoughts, their inspirations. They know that no matter what they're doing, their work is their own and no matter what other artists take way from it, they will put their own spin on the concept.

I love not being afraid. I love truly being able to call myself an artist and believing it. And I love the people who believed in me before I believed in myself. Thank you.

Stylish Blog Award

2011-02-22T09:02:00.000-08:00

It took a while for me to post this, but I've been awarded the Stylish Blog Award!

Many Thanks to

Made for Me by Oaklie
Handmade Fashion Scarves and More
http://madeformebyoaklie.com

This is very exciting and will give you an insight to some blogs you may never read.

Here's how it works:

Step 1 - Make a link back to the person who nominated you - thanks for Made for Me by Oaklie. Link done!

Step 2 - Share 7 random things about yourself.

Step 3 - Award 15 recently discovered bloggers to this award.

Step 4 - Contact these bloggers and tell them about it.

Here are my 7 random things:

1) I was a Richard Simmons Success Story (over 200 pounds lost) but am currently struggling with a 30 pound weight gain. I guess that still makes me a success although I don't feel like one right now.

2) I recently signed up for Animoto and am LOVING IT! Who knew I'd be infected by the age of technology? Making these videos is really fun! (If you look at the link, put me in as a referral and we'll both get an extra month on our subscription.)

3) Speaking of the age of technology, Eric got me a Verizon I Phone last weekend. O. M. G! Am I having fun? This may be the best toy ever and I can make phone calls on it too!

4) I am having a Spin-In at my home on February 27. If you're arts-and-crafts inclined, contact me privately for details! You don't have to spin yarns (of either kind) to come... bring what you like to work on and you'll be welcome.

5) I hate shopping. Ironic since I love selling my work - lol!

6) I finally rented my old condo. There's no turning back now.

7) I may have married into the Splaver clan,but I'm a "Splaver" in name only. To be a full fledged Splaver, you need to have an internal thermostat of about 110 degrees. They're always warm, no matter what the temperature. I'm always cold, no matter what the temperature! :D

So there you have it, that's a little about me. Now here are the 15 blogs I recommend you check out:

1. The Beebonnet Report by Janel Laidman
2. Tanglewood Fibers by Trish Anderson
3. The Panopticon by Franklin Habit
4. Claudia's Yoga by Claudia Regan
5. Modeknit / Knitting Heretic by Annie Modisett
6. Beadlust by Robin Atkins
7. Affirming Creativity by Vicki Schroeder
8. Art Bead Scene... Various Contributors
9. Getting Stitched on the Farm by Kristen Nicholas
10. Woven Thoughts by Sara Lamb
11.Creature Comforts by Ez
12.Fey Handmade by Christine Lindstrom
13. California Crafters of Etsy (CCCOE)... Various Contributors
14. Buzz Blog by Jen Wallace
15. The Yarn Harlot by Stephanie McFee

Sadly, not all of these blogs were "recently" discovered, but they're all superb and I'd rather give you links that you will enjoy and I know are consistent than those that may be here today, gone tomorrow. Now, I have to go. I have some e-mailing to surprised authors to do.

Edi's Little Treasures

2011-02-21T15:05:00.001-08:00

This weeks Featued Artisan is Edi's Little Treasures. True Treasures indeed.. Edi has wonderful creations! A Must have for every Jewelry Box!! You can find Edi at:

Good Night MIles!

2011-02-21T09:27:00.000-08:00

Miles is often difficult to get into bed. At age 9, he's watched is big brothers and sister get to stay up later than him, and his oldest brother "G-man" as his "real mother" would call him, would disrupt the entire family by sleeping all day and staying up all night. Belligerent and noisy, "G" would set a not-very-good example for Miles, who emulated him in many ways.

Fortunately, Miles has become much easier to handle in the weeks since "G" left for boarding school, but there still is the issue of getting him into bed and asleep.

First, he must strike just the right pose for starting out in the bed.

Hmmmm... where did he pick this pose up from? I suppose it's from "listening" to VH1 again. "Listening" to VH1 is how Miles picks up all of his best dance moves! I know. I've caught him "listening" late into the evening when he thinks I'm not going to notice that his TV is on well past his bedtime.

Then, it's necessary to borrow my camera and record an image of a poster of his favorite video game, "Halo Reach." Never mind that Halo Reach is a thing of the past in this home. These days, any time I have had it with a particular materialistic item the kids are playing with or want, is inappropriate, and/or it needs to be put away or gotten rid of, I threaten to "Halo Reach" it. It doesn't matter, though. Miles is still obsessed by the whole concept and especially the game. (We no longer allow any "M" rated video games into the home where children for which it is age-inappropriate can have access and amazingly, Miles has reverted to playing those that ARE appropriate for his age group.)

Then, there's the first laying down in the bed and being tucked in.

Ok, shut up now. It was a cold night and we needed "layers" to keep warm! There was the requisite sheets and blanket. Three regular pillows on top of his head. His decorative black throw pillow. His teddy bear. And I thought the Sombrero was a nice touch to finish the scene off. Miles was giggling like crazy under this pile of this-and-that - lol! :D :D :D

Of course, he's an active 9-year-old and despite me warning him not to move until his father arrived to tuck him in and kiss him goodnight (a daily ritual and a sweet one at that, he could not stay still.

After quite a bit of coaxing (and a little bit of gentle threatening - lol!), the child is now ready to be tucked in by Eric. Christiane (a long-time tremendously good friend and recently his sitter on the days/evenings when Eric & I are both out of the house... we're so incredibly lucky that she found time in her busy schedule to help us!) watches over him, warning him not to move again and again (and also ensure that he is safe and able to breathe) as I quickly gather Eric up before the scene is spoiled.

As Eric &; I approach, Christiane turns the lights out. This new bedtime routine is a surprise for Eric. And Eric plays along perfectly, entering the room and taking it from there like a pro:

As Eric leaves the room after this scene is completed, Miles springs out of bed, begging Daddy to "do it one more time!" We promise Miles that if he is good, gets back into bed now and goes right to sleep, Daddy will beat him into submission and sleep again the following night. Miles instantly behaves, and is asleep within 15 minutes.

This routine has become a regular ritual in our home....Miles being pummeled with pillows to sleep.

Miles loves it. So do I and so does Eric. It's wonderful to see a Father-Son relationship growing and building as we move more and more towards a normal family structure rather than Eric struggling just to keep afloat.

Despite all the transitional issues that any 54 year old woman who has been single and childless for her whole life would have when suddenly trust into the type of crazy situation I have been thrown into, there's no question that I love my family and I love my new life.

Shhhh! It's a secret!

2011-02-20T13:13:00.000-08:00

Friends have posted on their blogs about secret projects... things that they cannot talk about publicly. I find myself currently in the same position.

I can't tell you what I'm working on, but it's starting out with these beads:

Of course there will be lots more colors when this is complete... updates to follow.

* * * * *

I took two classes from Mary Hettmansperger on Friday and Saturday. I will find and post Friday's results when I can, but Friday wasn't such a fun day for me. It's hard when I try to learn skills that just don't come intuitively to me, and Friday was just one of those days.

Saturday was a different, though, as we learned all sorts of wire wrapping techniques. I will find my other samples - that I didn't complete - later too, but here's the finished item that I wrapped. I started out with a plain wooden elongated "donut" pendant and wrapped it. This is what I got:

Mary is delightful, by the way; and I thank my friends at Creative Castle in Newbury Park for bringing her and other artists of her calibur to their store so that we can learn from world class artists.

* * * * *

Sometimes when I complete a piece, it's done. Other times, it needs more work. This is one such item:

Before:

After:

It just needed that extra punch of gold stripe in the middle to make it pop! I'm taking this piece out of my Etsy store for the time being, though. Notice the lighter beads? I'd like to say that they're just a reflection of the sun glinting off of the bracelet, but they're not. In truth, they're beads that appear to have lost their color. Usually that happens only with cheap seed beads... often of Chinese origin because they dyed the surface of the beads rather than infused the beads with color the whole way through.

I'm confused by this happening with the beads in this bracelet, though, as they're supposedly Japanese - they make the highest quality and most technically engineered seed beads - and come from a VERY reputable source. I'm going to wear this bracelet myself for a while and see what happens, and bring the whole issue to the people who sold the beads to me in a couple of weeks. I know that they would never knowingly put out inferior product on their shelvs (I only deal with reputable sources) but sometimes stores can be victims too.

Meanwhile, back to my secret project.

Reconnecting with Old Friends

2011-02-15T16:31:00.000-08:00

One of my New Year's Resolutions was to reconnect with old friends. It happened in small bits and pieces in January, but finally, I was lucky enough to participate at Carol's home in the first Spin In I've attended in well over a year.

Oh, but I've missed my friends!

Share the Love: Bloggers Unite

2011-02-08T13:18:00.000-08:00

This Week's Featured Artisan isKim - Va Beach Quilter.. darling creations for you by a very talented lady!

Everything from A-Z! You can find Va Beach Quilter on:

Kim also has a Destash Shop and a Guild on Artfire for Shops with less than 15 sales.

Good Day, Sunshine!

2011-02-04T08:17:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I was pleased to have finished up Maria's order for her bracelet. She had seen what I didn't; that another bracelet that I had made looked like sunshine because of the colors chosen, and she wanted one that actually said Sunshine! It was fun and an honor to be able to fill her request.

It was an interesting process. One of the things that I did not tell her when presenting pics of her finished bracelet to her was that I had never made a Kumihimo bracelet before. I knew I could do it... it was easy in my mind and none of the skills were anything that I had not done on other items, but I needed to reconstruct the proportions in order to do her work properly. In fact, the braiding in her bracelet that actually will be sent was the 2nd attempt. The first time around, I made the braids too long, and as I was completing the bracelet, I knew for a fact that it would be too big for her.

I was a knitter (and a hand spinner and a weaver) before becoming a professional beader. Knitters have a saying when they make a mistake in their projects and don't realize it for a while, then have to take the project apart to correct the issue. The call taking the project out "Frogging It." That's because you have to rip all of your work apart, reclaiming the yarn. You "Rip it! Rip it! Rip it!"

Nobody likes frogging, but the only knitters who never make mistakes are the ones who either are not knitting or never take on a challenging project. I've frogged my share of clothing, and currently have a sweater made out of gorgeous yarn that I completed years ago, but I had done something wrong while following the pattern and it didn't just not fit, but it was impossible to wear. Some day soon, I'm going to frog that sweater and remake it. But back to task.

I needed to frog that initial bracelet for Maria, but in beading,unlike knitting, you can't always reclaim the parts. I was lucky. I WAS able to reuse everything, but rather than take the braids apart and use the beads again, I just left the braids in place and remade them in a shorter length. I wasn't sure what I was going to do with them... ultimately I made an interesting pair of earrings, but what I did know was that if I didn't send Maria something that was up to my own personal standard... something that I was sure she would enjoy, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. In the end, I'm so glad I took the time.

I posted this Animoto (I'm really going to have to blog about Animoto because it's so damned cool) in facebook last night about her bracelet:

It was late when I did so; I was flabbergasted and completely flattered when I almost immediately got this response from her:

Pinky-Grapefruit Maria Thank you so much for letting me be part of this creative process, the gorgeous bracelet and the very kind words!! The bracelet is beautiful as are all your pieces I have purchased. I think I will love this one the best of all because we did it together. WOW I had no idea how much work went into these. Awesome!! You are sooooo talented. Luvvies you ♥

Maria, I love you too!

I also got a lot of other compliments including this one from Claudia:

Another fabulous piece! Your talent is amazing! :)

I can't tell you how much these comments mean to me... thank you one and all! I know that I finally found my medium, my true passion and work, and that I'm getting better and better at it all the time, and I am not only practicing and getting better that way, but I'm picking up more and more skills through constant education. But the most important thing said was said by Maria:

"WOW I had no idea how much work went into these. "

Now I know why I bought that Animoto program. It gives me a chance to make all of my special order clients a chance to see their work in progress, but they also convey the amount of both love and hard work that goes into their orders. What I do is very labor intensive, takes a long time (even when I don't have to do it twice - lol!), and often my clients don't understand why I charge so much for it. It makes me feel good that they can see the process, clearly can see that the finished item is much higher quality than what they can buy off of a store shelf (mass merchandise bead jewelry is usually CRAP!), and why I charge what I do.

That's the thing. I have a set formula for how I charge for my work... I got it out of a "Selling Your Jewelry" book so I know that it's reasonable and fair, and I don't deviate unless I am offering a special promotion or reducing items permanently to clear inventory because my style or body of work has changed enough that the old doesn't represent what I do anymore. So I feel good about my pricing, but I wonder if my clients do too. With the Animoto, they can see what goes into their jewelry and I think it makes them feel better about my charges.

But back to task again. I have a number of other special orders still awaiting completion, especially for Sue who has been uber patient for over a year when she is my first and most important client. I have a bracelet and a pair of earrings to finish up (they're almost done), and then I am going to go back to work on a necklace in progress for her and just keep working straight through until it's done. Damned the teeny tiniest small heirloom beads I am making it out of... full speed ahead and if I continue to have trouble seeing them, well I'm going to have to break down and buy myself some kind of magnfication system.

In the meanwhile, I'm also starting to work on my web site and made real and noticeable progress on the jewelry page last night. I'd love it if any of my readers - who I appreciate more than you could know, especially when I am so irregular about posting - combed over it, looked for errors, and got back to me with any comments, positive or negative. Yes, I know that I need to update the header pictures and I'll get to that presently, but the body of the page is where I'd really appreciate your feedback.

Now, I have to scan my food sheets for Richard as today is the day I am turning them in (yet another story, but I'm trying to get my weight back to where it belongs), get dressed, and Eric & I will be going on a round of theraputic appointments this morning to try and come up with a plan in order to deal with the unique issues his ex wife and mother of his children present. Again, another post for another day if I ever post about it at all.

But for now, go out and have a day full of sunshine. If you're in an area of the country where the winter is at it's worst, you can still carry sunshine in your heart. I hope you do.

What is a Calorie?

2011-02-03T21:05:00.001-08:00

What is a calorie?

Calories are the little bastards that get into your wardrobe at night and
sew your clothes tighter.

MY CLOSET IS INFESTED WITH THE LITTLE SHITS

Thank you, "Sheep Thrills" yahoo group!

Share the Love: Bloggers Unite

2011-02-01T10:42:00.000-08:00

This Week's Featured Artisan is The Beas Knees.. darling creations for you by a very talented lady!

Beth has lot of creations for you to see! You can find The Bea's Knees on:

Etsy

Facebook

Making an Impression

2011-01-27T16:08:00.000-08:00

This morning started with Gabby assaulting Eric for a note saying he saw her report card. He hadn't. As it turns out, she got a "U" in one of her classes. Given her ADD and the fact that we made the decision to no longer medicate her for it (she hates the meds and her academic grades are high despite not having it), we're not surprised at this because she isn't called "Gabby" for nothing. Her teachers love her because she's an honor student; they hate her because she is seemingly incapable of shutting up.

So Eric wrote her the note.

"Dear M$. Monney, (It's pronounced like Monet, but everyone says it "Money" with two n's.)

I have seen my daughter, Gabriella Gregor Splaver's report card. It was very unimpressive.

Thank you,

Eric J. Splaver
Father of the Student"

Gabby didn't look at the note until Eric was herding the gang out the door to drive them to school. As usual, I was in the bathroom.

"DDDDAAAAAAADDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!" I heard Gabby screech from a different room. "I can't turn in a note like this!"

"What's the matter with it?" Eric calmly replied. (I could hear him suppressing laughter.)

"You can't say that my report card was unimpressive!"

"Well, you can press the note on the way to school and it will be nice and flat when you turn it in."

Have I mentioned that I love this man? His sense of humor is amazing.

Share the Love: Bloggers Unite

2011-01-25T18:04:00.000-08:00

This weeks Featured Artisan is Diane's Dangles! Diane has wonderful creations for you to see in her shops. Not only does Diane creation true treasures she is dedicated to promoting her fellow artisans which is a wonderfully kind act! You can find Diane's Dangles on:

Daine also has a 2nd shop on Artfire called BeadSouk... take a peek there too!

A Heart for Valentine's Day

2011-01-24T21:29:00.000-08:00

Today I was privileged to complete a very special order signifying parent's love for their daughter.

What an honor to be chosen to make this gift.

Thank you, Bonnie & Dan.

Happy Birthday and Happy Valentine's Day, Goose!

Snippits from Today

2011-01-16T20:08:00.000-08:00

We went to the Pasadena Bead and Design Show today.

As usual, there was plenty to see, plenty to buy. I had an agenda of a few items, then mostly looked around and selectively bought things that either 1.) I was running low on, 2.) Was such a good price that I couldn't resist, or 3.) An unexpected find that I couldn't pass up.

Eric and Miles joined me; I was shocked at how very good Miles was! At age 9, he still has ADD and at this show, he was polite and conservative, and easily amused by some of the amazing and unusual beads as well as other items to buy.

I saw the booth that last year invited me to come at teach at their store in Fresno. I didn't do anything about it at the time and have regretted it since. Now that I've taught my first official Public class and it was such a great experience, I'm anxious to repeat it. I will contact them. I also discussed teaching at a couple of other shops that showed today. Everyone was receptive to my work; everyone gave me contact info and said definitely call or e-mail.

But the biggest surprise came at the end of the show! Because I had "lost" Eric and Miles, I decided to wander through the rooms with finished goods while waiting for them to turn up. There, I came across a woman in the far corner that does the most exquisite bead embroidery necklaces imaginable. They're as good as my friend Temmy's work! Well, we talked for a while, got along beautifully, then she noticed what I was wearing.

She was very excited that I also do bead embroidery work that does not compete with what she does, but compliments it. She actually is interested in sharing a booth with me at upcoming shows!

Then she introduced me to a friend in the next booth over. The woman there has a shop of "Wearable Art" up in Cambria and is interested in having me submit my leather jewelry designs to her for consideration! We, too, got along beautifully and she suggested that she was going to have an Artisan Faire in the yard of her shop and all of us could come up for the weekend and show. It sounds like heaven to me!

As we were leaving the show, Eric was amused by all of the different names of the bead shops that are take-offs of other words. Kind of like ArtiZen Beads. But he had his own good idea what I should name a shop should I ever decide to change branding. Beady Amin. Yup. That's right. Beady Amin.

I think not.

Miles wanted to know what was so funny. We just told him it was an adult joke and left it at that.

Then, on the way back to the car in the parking lot, we saw this bumper sticker:

Hmmmm... makes me want a bumper sticker all of a sudden.

Fast forward home. I am making Eric & Garrett matching Bead Triangle Pendants

to wear at their request. They're in different colors than the one I have in my Etsy store (another to be listed soon in a very different color way), but the colors were chosen by Garrett and he did an excellent job. I'm sure they will both enjoy them.

Miles came skipping into our room and wanted to know what I was making. Of course, he was very upset that I was making something for Garrett and not for him. "You've never made me anything!" he lamented.

"Oh yes I have." I replied. "What about the Skull necklace, the Football necklace, the Claw necklace?"

"You made them for me?"

"Yes." I replied.

"Oh," Miles said. "They were so good that I thought you bought them.

Thanks, Miles - lol!

Share the Love: Bloggers Unite

2011-01-16T19:45:00.001-08:00

This weeks featured artisan is Jewelry by NaLa! NaLa has truly unique creations.. works of art you can wear!

You can find NaLa at:

NaLa also hosts a wonderful group on Facebook call Handmade Harbor!

Share the Love: Bloggers Unite

2011-01-12T18:59:00.001-08:00

This weeks Featured Artisan is Heart and Sow Designs! Wonderful creations

for you! "Sowing Seeds of Love"! You can find Heart and Sow designs at:

Zibbet

Changes, Always Changes

2011-01-10T09:41:00.000-08:00

You may have noticed not only the visual differences in my Blog, but that there are a lot of changes happening in the structure and focus too. Recent posts have been infrequent as I've been putting this site into a new order; one that is ordered better for my current life and lifestyle.

There have been many requests over the years for my recipes that I've occasionally posted here. I've actually created a space on the left tool bar in this blog where I am listing them as I find them. Additionally, when I started blogging, I did so using my web site proper rather than doing it in Blogger. Over the past 10 days or so, if you get Google Reader, you probably have noticed a lot of old posts showing up. That's because I'm moving them from my old site into Blogger for consistency. It's amazing... I'm finding a lot of old and good information and stories that I had forgotten as I've been moving them over, and also see how my focus has shifted away from food and recipes. With this knowledge, I'm hoping to bring some of the food focus back into play. But it will be different than before. Rather than preparing food only for me, I need to come up with healthy recipes that a full family will eat. I hope that you're interested as I explore this new territory.

I'm also creating separate pages devoted strictly to my art and my business. I hope that you will visit them from time to time to see if I've put anything new up.

On the right hand bar, I'm starting to put up links and lists related specifically to Artisans and Artists. As I get them posted, please be sure to visit some of my artist friend's web sites and shops. You'd be amazed at what wonderful things there are to acquire for gifts or yourself at reasonable prices. I personally love to shop from small businesses when I have the chance, and I hope you feel the same way.

I'm very busy with special order jewelry as well as getting ready to teach a very large class, but when that slows down a little, I will also be updating my web site. I'll let you know here what changes are made and when, and I hope you'll drop by there too.

Life is interesting, life is very exciting right now. My true wish is that you will stand by me and travel this new territory by my side. Thank you so much for bearing with me as I finish off the updates in my Blog and move on to the web site. Thank you so much for supporting my venture in Jewelry Making. I hope to be able to offer you things that you will want and want to buy, and I also hope that if you see things you like but have constructive criticism, you might use this forum (as well as private e-mail or phone calls for those of you who have access into my "real" life) to let me know how I can improve.

That is for all aspects of my life, too, not just jewelry. As I said to a great friend in an email a week ago, I was evolving when I met him, I am continuing to evolve, and I hope to always be evolving. To do so, I have to make a lot of mistakes along the way, because mistakes are how we truly learn. We learn from our mistakes much more than from our successes.

Happy New Year, my friends! I'm so happy that you stopped by to see me. Thank you for everything.

xoxoxoxoxo

Laura

Share the Love: Bloggers Unite

2011-01-05T16:48:00.001-08:00

This weeks Featured Artisan is Zur Designs... Beautiful collection of handcrafted jewelry just
waiting for you! Truly unique designs by a very talented lady!

You can find Zur Designs on:

Etsy
Blog
Facebook
Twitter
Tunkt

Happy Anniversary

2011-01-03T00:01:00.000-08:00

Eight years ago today, I walked through the doors of Slimmons and started working out with Richard Simmons. It was a hard decision to make; I wanted nothing to do with the man or the philosophy. I certainly didn't want to face my lifestyle and the choices I made. Instead, I blamed everything on my family, on my job, on my health issues.

Eight years is a long time, yet it seems like yesterday. It seems like yesterday that I was that angry person who refused to interact with others, didn't have many friends, had little life. But in those years, I made an amazing transformation into the woman I am now. Even with my current weight travails, I am within normal bounds, I know friendship and love and the bonds of a family of my own. Even with my health issues manifesting in new and increasingly difficult ways, I know the power not so much in believing that I will get better, but of suspending disbelief and being open to the possibility that things can profoundly change for the better, even against all odds.

There were many people who started helping me down this path before I met Richard, and many people who have helped me since I made the decision to travel this road. To all of them, I am profoundly grateful.

To Richard, for what it is worth, I owe you so very much. I'm never sure what my status is with you other than maybe a press release who's day has passed, but you have been, are, and will always be everything to me.

Thank you.

A New Year, A New Chance

2011-01-02T19:28:00.000-08:00

This morning, I stopped by Facebook to find this post by Adele:

Adele Silverman
So far all I have heard about 2010 is that it sucked. Please help me come up with good things that happened in 2010. I'll start with a few: 1) I made some new friends; 2) I began a new hobby which is also a tax deduction; 3) Ian graduated the 5th grade, and had two excellent schools competing for his attendance for 6th grade; 4) I may be getting old, but I've still got some of my health (no more skating for awhile)

Yesterday at 12:10pm · · Comment · View Feedback (14)Hide Feedback (14)

- Adele Silverman ‎5) Despite the economy, Steve and I still have our jobs; 6) our family became larger with the addition of a brother in-law and new nephews and a niece we adore; 7) I have been married to the most adorable nerd for 17 years!!!
  Yesterday at 12:12pm ·
- Virginia Valles Binion ‎1) my daughter graduated high school, got her licence (BIG help!), and got a job!
  2) got my card business moving
  3) sold more cards than ever!
  4) got involved in OWH and have met some very nice people!
  Yesterday at 1:07pm via Facebook Mobile · · 1 personLoading...
- Virginia Valles Binion oh, and 5) celebrated 10 years with my husband!!
  Yesterday at 1:08pm via Facebook Mobile · · 1 personLoading...
- Ann Merkins I turned the big 5-0 , celebrated our 33rd wedding anniversary, our son bought a "new to him" house, our oldest daughter gave us a beautiful new grandson (making it 4 grandchildren now), and our youngest daughter returned safely home from a tour of duty in Iraq. I would say 2010 was a pretty awesome year!!
  Yesterday at 1:15pm · · 2 peopleLoading...
- Claudia Kramer Regan I finished my Yoga Teacher Training and now am teaching regular classes. The kid made it into Notre Dame on full scholarship. I celebrated my 34th wedding anniversary (y'see? It can work) and we didn't have any hurricane warnings in 2010. That all makes it a great year for me. I'm glad it was a good year for you! :)
  Yesterday at 2:34pm · · 2 peopleLoading...
- Melissa Maksimenko Adele, don't forget that you are excersing on your eliptical. I would assume that your health is better since you have been doing the eliptical, you have a job, you have health insurance, you have two wonderful men in your life that still love you. Hopefully that will put a smile on your face! Happy New Year!
  Yesterday at 3:10pm · · 1 personLoading...
- Adele Silverman Melissa, I didn't forget that for a minute. I have a history of heart disease in my family. My dad had his first open heart surgery at the age of 47. I just went to the doctor last week and found out that I had the best cholesterol level I can remember ever, and I'm not on cholesterol medication. Yay for that, too! I wish I knew what I was doing right or different so that I can keep it up.
  Yesterday at 3:33pm ·
- Melissa Maksimenko Keep doing what your doing. It's working.
  Yesterday at 3:35pm ·
- Adele Silverman Melissa, I still want to hear what went RIGHT with your year!
  Yesterday at 3:37pm ·
- Melissa Maksimenko Well lets see...... Our older son went back to college at a four year college, my husband and I still have jobs, I enjoy running with friends and don't have to go on any medication due to running, and last but not least was able to go to Maine to see my parents and siblings.
  Yesterday at 3:44pm · · 1 personLoading...
- Robin Persun
  Nice thread.
  
  Let's see. I have a wonderful fiance and dog - a roof over my head, a great new job which I believe is only going to get better.
  
  I'm still in the ER where I love it, but have moved into education and middle management. New th...ings to learn and new challenges to tackle.
  
  I hope I can continue to keep all the great friends that I've met on the job - and that the new job won't negatively impact that.
  
  Job security as a nurse, health insurance, a tiny bit of money in the bank.
  
  My family and loved ones still have good health.
  
  I am thankful for so much. Just wish the family was closer - a lot closer.
  
  I'm hoping if we learn one thing this year it is that we as a bunch could be more thankful and patience and loving and peaceful. Realization that it's ok to agree to disagree could be a good start.See More
  
  22 hours ago · · 1 personLoading...
- Laura Rebecca Silverman
  ‎1.) Got married, got children, 2.) Accepted into experimental program to treat disease, 3.) Had thyroid issue diagnosed... lead to an end to the fainting spells, 4.) Got my business started up again and poised to really move on it in 2011..., 5.) Sunny is still with me despite all odds, 6.) Addition of many pets and a large ex Porn house - lol!, 7.) Asked to teach my first professional beading classes, 8.) Won a couple of awards for my beading in international contest the first time out, 9.) Several write ups for my work, 10.) Learned a lot about friendsSee More
  
  8 hours ago · · 1 personLoading...
- Audrey Cooperman Thacker ‎1) My husband, kids and I remain healthy; 2) my parents remain (reasonably) healthy--no hospital scares in 2010!; 3) I continue to do work that makes a little bit of difference in a field that lets me use my education; 4) I started writing more; 5) Samuel had his Bar Mitzvah; 6) We all worked on complaining less and being more grateful
  8 hours ago · · 1 personLoading...
- Audrey Cooperman Thacker I'm going to steal your status and post it, Adele! This is great.
  5 hours ago ·

I had been planning to write about the transition from 2010 to 2011 anyway, but her post put me in a completely different frame of mind. Rather than feeling morose because 2010 was a very mixed bag and even the major highlights hold memories so painful that they're hard to think about, I ended up feeling very optimistic about both the past and especially the future. That is, if I work the future and work it right.

Ok, so I lost some friends and some friends are in a holding pattern until they see if I'm able to pull it together well enough this year for my presence to be tolerated. That's not so terrible. I know more about them now, and they know more about me too. They learned that I am not the "all powerful one" who always holds it together no matter what the crisis, and those who are sticking around are finding out that I do bounce back, even after hitting what I would call my lowest low of all time. Of the friends that I lost, I feel terrible. I will miss them an awful lot, but on the other hand, if they're unable to stick by me when I'm truly in a crisis, do I really want to call them friends anyway? Maybe they were just great acquaintances that I like an awful lot. I learned a lot about the friends that I kept, too.

I got a rude awakening about what family life consists of. I've made some major changes within the family's structure since I came to join them, and I've learned to bend with some of the other issues. I have a much better understanding of what my friends who have children are going through, and I also know the agony/joy of special needs kids. Although I thought I was empathetic before, now that I really know from first hand experience, I have an entirely different attitude and level of respect for those who deal with unique kids and unusual families.

I faced a major health crisis at the beginning of the year which bounced me into the hospital twice. It was horrible, it was painful. But out of the crisis came the chance to join an experimental program focusing on IBD and while I'm not sure whether or not it's helping me, I know without question that at least I'm in a holding pattern. In years past, I already knew at this point that I was starting to crash again. I'm not crashing at the moment. Coincidence? Maybe. But maybe it's the program. Time will tell.

My actual wedding and wedding reception (separate events) included incidents that are terribly painful to remember and almost bring me to tears still, but the bottom line is that I am a married woman now, something that nobody ever would have predicted, and I love the man who I am with. Not everyone is so lucky. I wake up every day knowing that I am where I am supposed to be after all of these years. It could be worse.

Living in the "House of Porn" has been challenging for all the problems that it presents. There are so many things wrong with it, it's scary. Every time we get a repair issue looked at, it's like peeling back an onion and finding more and more things wrong, and the landlord has not been exactly forthright or terrific about fixing things. Half the Heating/Air system still does not function properly and after 5 months, there's still no hot water in the master bathroom. The roof leaks. Etc. BUT, it's a PORN HOUSE! How cool is that and how many people get to make that claim? It's drop-dead gorgeous, it's lay-out is perfect for us, my dogs are both thriving here... even Sunny who when Cosmos died, everyone predicted would be gone in months, all the kids have their own bedrooms, and if serendipity kicks in, it's possible that this will be our permanent location. Eric & I both agree that if we end up buying the house, we will immediately repair all of the terrible things that are plaguing us, and then turn our attention to the design details that are amazingly stupid but can be corrected. I've rebuilt a home before (1994 Northridge Earthquake, thank you very much) and it was a really cool experience. And if we decide to move, we both love this area for the homes and also it's quirkiness. We will stay in the same area.

I failed to keep a lot of commitments in 2010; I did not give as much as I took. Well, there's no time like the present to deal with the issues, fulfill my promises, and pay back and/or pay forward the debt of gratitude that I owe. I started that process about 2 weeks ago and that's a commitment I made to myself that will be kept. I even have a list of things that need to be done, and I'm plugging away at it. As I do what I promised and what I need to do, it remains to be seen how the friends that I let down receive me. Again, no matter what happens in the end, I will be better for it. I will have the peace of mind of knowing that I did what I promised, albeit belatedly, and also I will know who are friends who are capable of forgiveness vs. those who are not. That's powerful information to have.

Between illness and marriage transitional issues, I did almost nothing to pursue my art. That's been a terrible disappointment and I feel that I failed myself. Again, some of the commitments in the prior paragraph have to do with exactly that, and I've moved back into the creative zone. Eric has found us an office that, as soon as it's fixed up, will become my studio away from home. I am updating my blog in appearance and function, and will soon start the same process in my web site. I'm better than I've ever been at what I do, and I have a direction in 2011 that equates to a business plan. I know where I'm going. I don't know all the details yet on how I'm getting there, but my whole life has been lived with a vague idea and a wish and things haven't turned out so bad. I have faith that I will succeed.

In addition, despite doing next to no work, I did get some serious public acclaim for my work last year, and that is going to stand me well in the coming months.

The end of the year brought a nasty surprise in the form of Bursitis and Avascular Necrosis. Both are extremely painful and can be life changing. The former is confirmed; when the latter is, the outlook will not be good. But a lot of positive results came out of the situation too. First and foremost, while having the issue(s) diagnosed, I had a blood test that officially threw me into the Slow Thyroid classification and I was started on medication. It was supposed to be 6 weeks before I noticed it doing anything, but I knew - in a good way - that it was having a profound impact on my state of being within 3 days. It turned out to be a terrific surprise. Unbeknown to me and never considered by my doctors was that all the fainting I was doing was a result of going in and out of Thyroid Crisis, and as soon as I started the meds, I stopped fainting! This after years and years to chasing the reason I was doing so. Additionally, my hair suddenly started to grow back. It cycled in and then out again, but at my latest doctor's appointment, my thyroid medication was doubled and it seems to be coming in with a vengeance now. Nobody saw this coming. And who knows? It's possible that I'm still not on a high enough dose and more good things are coming.

I've reunited with Rocky, my long-term Physical Therapist, and he not only knows how to help me, but Eric has an issue that's plagued him for years that Rocky may be able to help. With the turn of the year and the change in Eric's medical insurance coverage, I'm very hopeful that he will be in treatment soon and that there will be a positive result for him.

I had not what I'd exactly call a major blow-out with a long time friend who I love dearly and who's job it is to help people (God only knows he's helped me in amazing ways) but more an emotional tiff and I'm not sure if the relationship is over or not. Like with my other friends above, I hope and pray that things will work out in time. It remains to be seen. His focus has always been different than normal people and while I am not exactly normal either, I've become more satisfied with where I'm at. Whether that's something that can be bridged between us or not remains to be seen. BUT things happen for a reason. Maybe we'll be better than ever, or maybe this is a message that I've received all that I was supposed to from this source and it's time to move on. Goodness knows that I've changed so much over the past many years that it's completely possible that the world that he lives in isn't appropriate for me anymore. I hope not, but there's also the possibility of a compromise or a happy medium. Whatever happens, I've become secure enough in myself that I know that I may be very disappointed in coming months, but I will survive. That's also good information to have.

I don't get to live my life just for myself anymore because no matter what I do, for the next 15 years or so until Miles has graduated from College, the children always have to come first. But there's a satisfaction, even when there's infinate frustration, in helping them along to see their dreams come true. Whatever they become, and I know it will be for the good, I will have played a significant role in it. That's tremendous power and this is probably the most important job I will ever do in my entire life.

And so 2011 has begun. Richard Simmons, several years ago, convinced me to build a road map to my future by setting resolutions for myself at the beginning of each year. The first couple of years, that practice was very satisfying. I did all the things I set out to do, and more. And then I got sick and I was physically unable to keep them, and I resolved that I was not going to make resolutions ever again until my health stabilized out. But I'm finding that right now in my new state-of-being, they might be very useful again, and so instead of just doing the first one which I had announced to Eric about a month ago, I have a short but important list. So here they are, stated publicly for all to know.

Resolutions: 2011

1.) I, in conjunction with Eric, are going to get that Lexus SUV that's been on hold at the dealership for over 18 months repaired and out of hock, and I will be driving it before the year is over so we can save my Nissan - who's quality is not as good and who's mileage is increasing - for our first child who earns the privilege to drive.

2.) I will work very hard in Physical Therapy and pursue all medical options to beat - or at least live with - the newest health issues that have been thrown at me and I will be as healthy as possible. I will figure out what means of exercise I am capable of participating in, and no matter what venue it's in, I will do it. I can learn to love anything if I set my mind to it.

3.) I will make sure all the friends who I let down, either by not keeping commitments, or by taking their help and support without reciprocating appropriately, know how much I value them. I will work hard on the commitments that I let lapse, and will fulfill them, even if they are late.

4.) I will write the Thank You notes for gifts received for our Wedding by the end of February. As I understand it, it's appropriate to take six months to get them out (some sources say a year). I can't live with six months, let alone a year, so I will start the task shortly and methodically write them all, then send them out in one big batch. I will photograph said mailing and post it in my blog.

5.) I will work hard at my art and promote myself this year so that I am a known persona within my field (at least locally) and I will generate enough of an income to make a difference to our living circumstance. I will accept that I do not have the brain power or the health that Eric has and can never generate the same cash flow as he is capable of, but I bring other things to the table that are equally as important to the family and I will learn not to stress over the difference.

6.) I will read regularly. Be it books, newspapers, magazines, on line sources, or whatever, I will pursue reading for both the knowledge that I gain and also for the sense of peace and accomplishment that I get out of it.

7.) I will reconnect with the friends that I have kept, and I will find more friends to fill the empty space left by those who have gone. I will do so selectively, making sure that the new friends I pick up have common interests, living circumstances, and goals as me so that they're long-term friends and not just situational.

8.) I will be a teacher. I will not only teach classes in my chosen career field, but I will teach by example and I will teach the children the right and ethical way to live.

9.) I will be a perennial student.

10.) I will strive to be the best person I can be in all forums. Health. Weight. Mother (step). Animals. Housekeeping. Finance. Art. Friendship. Family. and whatever else comes my way.

So these are my goals and resolutions for this year. They are not easy; they are not easily measured. But they are achievable, at least I think so right now. And I know from life experience that I don't always have to believe in myself or my tasks to make them come true. I just have to suspend disbelief and amazing things can happen.